So I made this list, forever ago, of things I wanted to do this summer. It is an extreme official list, not one of my post-it army, but a saved word document on my laptop. Every time I'd mope around at school, I'd try to think of something to inspire me to make it to june, and thus the list was born. After being home a month, I opened up SUMMER.doc for for the first time to see how I'm doing. Of the 12 books I have listed, I've successfully finished 1 of them (Harry Potter...I mean, duh of course that got read), and thought about reading 3 of them. Of the 7 movies (I am including "all 007 films" in one go) I only saw 1.5 (only made it through half of The Heart of Country). I did a little better in the heading Everything Else as I could technically check off "Visit El Centro (party/desert/trailer sleep)", "road trip to somewhere (anywhere)", and "get a tan" from my trip to the river this last weekend. Me and Kayla totally stopped in El Centro for lunch, and everything else happend at the river--but still counts. The last two, "bon fire on the beach" and "bbq", require a group of available friends, of which I am slightly lacking...so those might take a while. The last section, Self Improvement, is a short section, but nonetheless a complete failure. I have not learned to cook a single item (our new toaster oven has yet to produce an edible toasted obeject). I have not learned to be a clean person (that is painfully obvious by the state of my room in which I'm sitting right now). Last of all, I haven't resolved any unresolved issues. So there you go, proof that it doesnt matter how solid my to-do-lists are, they all suffer from the same ineveitable fate: ignoration. (what is a noun for 'ignore'??)
I changed the CD in my stereo today. Now you might assume this is a normal, every day thing for your average 19yr old. But, well, you'd be wrong. Sometimes I get stuck on one CD and it sort of just lives in my stereo for goodnessknowshowlong. For whatever reason, it is always exactly what I feel like listening to. John Mayer's Room for Squares has been residing in my CD player for, well, since it's existence in my posssesion. I was sitting in my room and I hit 'play' without thinking about, when I realized, I just didn't feel like john any more. My CD case was in the car (left over from my san diego roadtrip, which I realllly need to remove before it gets stolen) sooo I rumaged around the handful of none-cased cds I had laying around my floor and put in Goo Goo Dolls' Dizzy Up the Girl. It was odd hearing jonny's voice instead of John's... and somehow I thought it might be symbolic of something. My moving on CD-wise maybe had some correlation to me moving on otherwise... but then tonight, as I was sitting in my room again logging online to check email, I didn't even give Dizzy Up a chance, I missed the Squares. So, here I am, back to Love Songs for No One, and back to whatever it is that I can't seem to move on from.