||[May. 26th, 2003|04:16 pm]
k i m b e r l y
|||||who will save your soul, by Jewel||]|
So, i feel like I haven't written in a while.. so instead of doing my essay, I'll update my livejournal. Hm... what to write about..... I guess the trouble is, most stuff on my mind right now isn't exactly the kind of stuff I want posted to the world, ya know? I s'pose that's why I haven't been such a frequent updater (still a million years more current than chris , who's had like 3 entries in two weeks). Hm, well, I was thinking today, on the way home from the beach, how the biggeset thing that's changed about me in college is my ability to survive outside my comfort zone. At home, I never hung out with people that I didn't consider really good friends, because otherwise I'd turn down the offer. I didn't know them that well, why would I want to eat lunch with them? But here, it's way different. I eat lunch with all kinds of people, and can spend time with people that i don't even particularly get along with that well. And I think that's a good thing. The world isn't full of best friends, it's filled with people you sorta know. I am, by no means, a social butterfly, but in comparison to my former self, I think I've made a step in the right direction. Even though I do spend a lot of time in the room here, it's still worlds more outside/people activity than I would ever have felt comfortable with at home. I have my more hermitage moments, but I'm trying to overcome them. I just don't want to slip back into old habits when I get home. I want to still like to talk on the phone and hang out with people, even if I'm a little tired. I want to just go out to eat with people. I want to watch movies until 2am, and not feel like I should be home in bed. I want to be able to just drive over to someone's house, just to spend time with them for no reason. I just don't want to make my entire summer "alone time". Trust me, I'll be getting all the beautiful solitude I want (I will have my own room, after all) but I can't let it be the only thing I ever feel like doing. Even if i don't have any friends to hang out with, that doesn't mean I can't go out alone...read at a coffee shop or something...
Oh well, that's just what I was thinkng about.